10% Happier book summary

 

Summarized in a single sentence, 10 percent Happier demonstrates how and why letting go of your ego is critical for leading a stress-free life by presenting the science behind this mindfulness practise in an unflinching way that even sceptics can understand.

Isn't it wonderful to be an ABC News correspondent? The money is good, and you get to tell the world what's important because millions of people recognise your face. When the pressure is too much for some, they break.

Dan Harris had a panic attack on national television 12 years ago and lost his voice as a result. He began a long journey into stress science and, eventually, mindfulness after he was persuaded that it was time to do some digging into himself and his life. Dan was a sceptic at first, but he eventually learned to control his ego through meditation and wrote a best-selling book about it in 2014.

It is important to understand why your ego can be problematic, and how meditation can assist you in the process of letting it go:

1. There's a problem with your ego because it's always looking for more.
2. Letting go of your ego doesn't make you a pushover: Be simple, not a simpleton.
3. Meditation gives you a fourth habitual response that enhances your mindfulness and compassion.
   

Interested in boosting your happiness by at least 10%? Please continue reading.

Lesson #1: Your ego gets in the way of your happiness because it is constantly striving for more.

Your ego becomes unsatisfiable because of the conflict between living in the moment and dwelling on the past and the future. Eckhart Tolle, in his book The Power of Now, makes a similar point about the importance of living in the present moment.

It's Dan Harris' belief that the ego is constantly evaluating one's worth by comparing one's own wealth, appearance, and social standing to those of others. As a result, the default state for your ego is a thirst for more. A new achievement, toy, or compliment resets your ego's desire baseline, and it immediately begins looking for the next thing.

Anxiety and stress are its favourite 'foods', and if they aren't available, it will dig up an old problem or crisis and harass you with it. So, the ego is never happy, and it's your job to take control of that, because no matter how high you go, it will never be enough.

It's time to put the pedal to the metal!

Lesson #2: Don't be a simpleton; don't let your ego get in the way of your success.

Is it possible that letting go of my ego would cause me to lose my competitive edge?

Nope! If you want to, you can change that. The opposite is true. Some people take the Buddhist philosophy of letting go too far, and as a result, they refuse to let themselves orgasm during sex or allow others to place their restaurant orders for them, in an effort to avoid expressing their own preferences.

That's a complete and utter waste of time. One of Munindra's students approached him while he was arguing over the price of a bag of peanuts at the local market and asked him if this was in line with his earlier lesson. Munindra retorted, "I said be simple, not a simpleton!"

Instead of making you a soft target, practising mindfulness simply enhances your creativity and productivity. As a result, you'll be able to focus on the task at hand instead of succumbing to temptations to engage in aggressive behaviour, which reduces your stress level.

Because his thoughts were less jumbled and disorganised, Dan was able to produce a flood of ideas while on a meditation retreat.

Lesson #3: Developing a fourth habitual response during meditation helps you become more aware and compassionate.

So, how can we harness the power of meditation to take control of our ego and rekindle our passion?

By practising mindfulness and present-moment awareness, we become more empathetic and compassionate toward others. In order to do so, meditation gives you another habitual response. All of our experiences are characterised by one or more of these three common responses, according to ancient Buddhist wisdom.

Firstly, We desire it. What happened the last time you passed by a hamburger joint when you were in need of a snack? Yeah. That.

Secondly, We don't accept it. Did you ever have a spider land on your finger? You probably discarded it right away.

Thirdly, We become engrossed in our thoughts. I'm sure you're like me and always listen to the flight attendant's final safety instructions. There you go.

There is a fourth option that becomes available when one begins to meditate: simply observing, without judgement.

In most cases, it begins with physical discomfort, such as a sore leg or itchy nose, but you can resist the urge to scratch. Once you've been doing it for a while, it starts to affect your feelings and thoughts as well. While gossiping, acting out on a bad habit, or thinking negative thoughts, you'll be able to observe your feelings without reacting to them.

As a result of this little pause between thinking and acting, you'll be able to make better decisions overall.