A Beginner’s Guide to the End Summary

Brief Summary: Using the principles of stillness, cleaning, and grieving, A Beginner's Guide to the End shows you how to get ready for death, whether it's your own or that of a loved one.

There are a lot of reasons why this is a common source of anxiety for people. No one wants to talk about it, and no one wants to think about it either. The topic possesses the power to halt us in our tracks and render us speechless.

I'm referring to death here.

We all die one day, regardless of whether we want to think about it. Rather than being morbid, I say this because simply acknowledging and talking about death makes it a little less traumatic. That's because anticipating what's going to happen makes you less vulnerable to being taken by surprise when it does.

A Beginner's Guide to the End: Practical Advice for Living Life and Facing Death by BJ Miller and Soshana Berger contains all the information you'll need to be death ready. I know it's scary to think about death, but I'm here to tell you that doing so will make you a better person.

The following are three of the most important lessons I've learned from this book:

Take some time for yourself when you learn you have a terminal illness. 

1. By clearing your belongings, resolving any unanswered questions, and leaving a meaningful

2. When a loved one passes away, don't put too much pressure on yourself right away. Instead, allow yourself to grieve naturally.

3. Are you willing to face your fears of death and learn how to be better prepared for it? Start now!

Lesson #1: It's best to take things one step at a time after learning of your own terminal illness.

Death makes us reflective. For some, they need to process what is going on before they can carry out their duties effectively. It's a harrowing experience that many people struggle to comprehend at first. The fact that you need some time to process everything is not a sign of weakness.

I was far away in another region doing my national service when I heard of the passing of my mother. I was shell shocked. This made me reflect on my life. Following the news that you have a terminal illness, it's important that you take some time to rest and recharge.

Call your loved ones as soon as you've had enough time to process what's happened. They will be the most encouraging and supportive of you during this difficult time. With their help, it's much more preferable than trying to handle it on your own. Do not let the Internet or other sources of information distract you from your studies. Googling your condition at this point isn't a good idea.

Also, resist the urge to give up any coping mechanisms you may have, such as smoking, drinking, or overindulging in sweets. Whatever it is that helps you deal with it easier, do that. Don't make any big decisions until you've had some time to think about them.

Lesson #2: Before you die, make sure you've taken care of all your secrets and possessions and left something special for the people you care about most.

You'll leave behind nothing when you die. So, make sure you clean up after yourself, so your loved ones don't have a lot to deal with when you're gone. Rather than having to clean out your attic after you die, give them the gift of being able to focus on you alone.

It's a nice gesture to leave something special for your loved ones to look back on, like a letter. Dispose of the old items. Do not leave anything you do not intend to pass on.

When a grandmother was nearing the end of her days, she would attach a piece of tape to objects and print the name of the recipient on it. After she passed away, that made life a lot easier for the rest of us.

You'll also want to clear up any lingering resentments or regrets you may have had. When your children only find out about your infidelity and half-sibling after your death, it's especially difficult. Even if the pain you've caused others doesn't affect you after your death, those you leave behind will always remember it. "I'm sorry" and "I love you" are two of the most important words you can say to someone.

Lesson #3: When a loved one passes away, remember to give yourself some space and allow your grief to wash over you like a tide.

After the death of a loved one, the best thing to do is to focus on gentle self-care.

You have the right and the obligation to grieve. It's perfectly acceptable to cry, rage, or do whatever else your heart desires. Allow yourself to be washed over by the waves. Grief affects people in diverse ways. A hole in the wall could be made by someone. Until she saw The Lion King, another person managed to keep it all in until she sobbed uncontrollably. Don't be afraid to express your feelings and do what works best for you.

Once you've lost someone, there are a few things you'll need to do before the funeral. Avoid putting too much pressure on yourself aside from that. Do whatever it is that calms and soothes you. Even if you're just watching a few episodes of your favorite TV show or eating an entire tub of ice cream, do it! Don't put too much pressure on yourself.